The Costume Debate: Why Bridesmaids Are Saying “No” To Paying


Each tradition has its customs and traditions concerning weddings and who pays for what. Historically within the U.S., bills associated to the marriage day are primarily dealt with by the bride’s household, whereas the groom’s household takes care of extra occasions such because the rehearsal dinner and the honeymoon.

In our trendy period, these traditions are open to interpretation. Some brides count on their bridesmaids to cowl the price of their gown only for the privilege of being a part of the marriage get together. In fact, some ladies do not thoughts as a result of they’re serving to their member of the family or buddy out financially, however how a lot is an excessive amount of?

Individuals on a well-liked web discussion board just lately got here collectively to debate the difficulty and share some private tales. 

1- Bride Forgot Everybody’s Finances

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One bridesmaid dropped out of a buddy’s wedding ceremony get together as a result of she was anticipated to pay $900 for her gown and was thought of impolite for not wanting to take action.

A discussion board member requested if the bride was wealthy. “Properly, she wasn’t, however she married wealthy and abruptly forgot what it was like to not have cash,” the ex-bridesmaid replies. “She requested me to borrow cash from my unemployed boyfriend (now husband) and informed me to dump him after I mentioned I’d by no means ask that of him. Protected to say we aren’t associates anymore.”

2- 4 Instances a Bridesmaid

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One discussion board member says that she’s been a bridesmaid 4 occasions and, every time, was anticipated to pay between $100 and $350 per gown. “It is ridiculous to suppose {that a} bridesmaid needs to be anticipated to dish out a whole lot, if not hundreds, of {dollars} for a bridal bathe and bachelorette events.” This individual believes that wedding ceremony tradition has gone loopy — particularly as now many individuals count on to make an elaborate full weekend journey because the bachelorette get together. 

3- Bride Anticipated Too A lot

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Some folks really feel everybody round them must pay for the good thing about being their buddy. A discussion board member says she would not converse to a girlfriend anymore as a result of they anticipated her to pay for a vacation spot bachelorette get together, a $200 gown, get to the vacation spot wedding ceremony, and purchase an engagement reward. 

4- Banned for Their Opinion

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Individuals really feel so strongly about this new wedding ceremony tradition that one individual bought banned from a marriage planning discussion board for expressing that elaborate bachelorette journeys should not be the brand new norm as a result of they had been unfair to the attendees who had been anticipated to pay. “That is unbelievable! To not point out the amount of cash you spend on themed clothes and accessories.”

5- The Bride Will Have a Meltdown

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One bridesmaid is attending a vacation spot wedding ceremony in Costa Rica and says she would not thoughts the fee as a result of it is a trip for her too. Nevertheless, she’s involved as a result of the bride-to-be retains demanding an increasing number of. “It is a number of break day work that may damage the pockets. On prime of this, we have additionally completed the engagement get together and bridal bathe, spent $400 on the gown, and she or he now needs to do a bachelorette weekend eight hours away. I actually cannot afford extra break day work, however I do know she’ll have a meltdown if I say I am unable to go.”

6- Gold Sequinned Costume

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A possible bridesmaid bought kicked out of a wedding ceremony get together after she misplaced her job due to sickness and will now not afford the gown. “It was a $250 gold sequin single-shoulder floor-length robe that I’d by no means ever put on once more. I used to be known as ungrateful. I used to be sleeping 13 hours an evening, and my coronary heart fee was at all times 140 BPM. I am so egocentric.”

7- Not Simply in The US

A Yoruba bride enters traditional wedding with her group of friends. Nigerian traditional clothing.
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An African discussion board member says that the expectation for the bridesmaids to contribute cash is not simply within the West. “Except the bridegroom may be very rich, bridesmaids must cowl the prices of the material and different prices to make the same clothes, excessive heels for the church service, then flat footwear for the reception.” They’re additionally anticipated to cowl the price of the make-up artist and hairdressing. Groomsmen are additionally anticipated to cowl the price of their fits and footwear. 

8- Household Ought to Pay

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One individual says that she was anticipated to pay $276 for her bridesmaid’s gown when she wasn’t doing effectively financially. She was additionally informed that she had to purchase gold heels. “I used to be very upset, but it surely was for my sister, so I could not say ‘no.’”

Understandably, that is the bride’s large day, however not contemplating the circumstances of family and friends when making these calls for makes them entitled.

A discussion board member responded by saying, “I really feel like a household ought to particularly pay for his or her relations’ bridesmaid clothes or groomsmen fits. If the relations had been attending as friends solely, they might put on one thing they have already got or that they’d put on once more, however that is not often the case when the couple chooses the garments.”

9- Rental Attire

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In lots of circumstances, groomsmen can hire their fits or tuxedos. As a number of folks identified, the possibilities of groomsmen sporting a swimsuit one other time is slim — particularly in the event that they’re anticipated to put on a selected shade or type. Somebody says there needs to be the same service for bridesmaids’ clothes.

“Companies like Hire the Runway and all have been nice for wedding ceremony friends. Nevertheless, you are not allowed to tailor any of the clothes you hire (not like a swimsuit), so it may be way more difficult to discover a good match.” A latest groomsman says, “I simply dropped $250 on a tux rental for a marriage. Not the tip of the world, however particularly annoying when the groom will get his free for sticking the remainder of us with a selected tux from a selected clothes shop.”

Supply: (Reddit).

Ree Winter is a contract meals, journey, and way of life journalist. She is an Australian who enjoys touring the globe and presently calls New Orleans house. Her byline in The Thrillist, Contained in the Magic, The Streamable, Mashed, The Day by day Meal, House Advisor, and Weekend Notes. Fellow Australians could have seen her printed work in The Geelong Advertiser and Docklands Information. Apart from this, she follows her passions in historical past and journey plus will gladly admit to being a loopy cat girl.


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